Crystal Lexus Makes Me Care About Lexus
March 5th, 2010Move over TRON lightcycle – I’ve got a new ride in mind.

Harper Goff Mystery Illustration
February 27th, 2010I have this 34 x 11.5″ gauche painting by Harper but I can’t figure out what it was for. Harper worked as a set designer for Warner Brothers in the 40’s then worked on several Disney projects including Art Directing 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea (which won an Oscar for the design), and later, after Disney, the famous Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and The Fantastic Voyage. If you have any clue what film had a scene like this set in North Africa or someplace with moorish ruins occupied by British? soldiers – let me know. I can’t find anything.
UPDATE: As the commenter below noted it MIGHT be from the 1936 Charge of the Light Brigade – watching the trailer suggests the same costumes and the same settings. But Harper would have been about 25 at the time, and would they have rendered color illustrations for a B/W film?

The Horrors Of Elementary School Anti-Drug Door Decorating
February 23rd, 2010Seriously – U MUST look through the whole set. My jaw is in pain its been hanging open so long.


This woman’s whole photo set is shocking really – I guess this is what “normal” people do – make sandwiches from what they have left in the fridge. Then photograph it. And list the ingredients – with estimated calories!
Rita’s Living Room Installation
February 23rd, 2010OMG Hercules Opera Look Has Me Gagging
February 22nd, 2010Staged last month in Amsterdam by De Nederlandse Opera. I mean really – could this action-figure execution be more genius?
Brought 2 my attn via http://barihunks.blogspot.com
The Walt Disney Family Museum Basement Floor
February 20th, 2010Wacky Window Valentine
February 14th, 2010Nixon In China Poster
February 11th, 2010Long Beach Opera liked my poster and set design for Good Soldier Schweik enough to ask me to design a poster for their next production too. Which I’m happy about because there WAY TOO MUCH shitty theater poster design in this town. I’ve often thought i should offer my services to theater row here in LA at mega-discount rates just to combat the eye pollution problem. Thats my weakness – i offer my services to fix things that are ugly – not jobs that pay well. Like this little chinese restaurant down the street that has this awesome facade but it’s painted in shit colors and one of these days i’m going to walk in (much like I did with the sex club) and say I think you should hire me to pick new colors for your exterior – and your interior – and let me redesign your logo – and menus…

Story Time: Disney Legend Talked Balls, Bananas
February 8th, 2010Ever since the first time I saw theater I wanted to design theater. Then I saw Disneyland and knew THAT was what I wanted to design. In Jr High we took one of those tests that tells you jobs you’d be good at if you weren’t sure. I was sure and checked the box for “other” and wrote in artist and Imagineer. How exactly this boy in Fargo, North Dakota would accomplish this, I wasn’t sure. But those cartoons said dreams can come true.

Less then 10 years later I was working at my first job, and it was the only job I ever wanted. I was in the model shop at Imagineering restoring an antique miniature carousel to be the centerpiece of a new resort in Florida. (I would later go on to do concept and show design.) Overseeing this project was “Disney Legend” John Hench, a 90-some year old fond of wearing ascots – ascots! I knew very well who he was – because I was practically a Disney historian – and when he’d stop by my cubicle I’d try to get him talking about the old days. This wasn’t hard as I was working with a woman he liked to entertain.
The stories were all news to her, as she, like a surprising (to me) number of Imagineers, knew little about Disney history. I soon realized though, he’d edit himself in the company of women, and it wasn’t until we were alone that I got the good stuff. Like when he began to tell me why he thought the Disney parks had sustained such popularity. It had to do with humans having a subconscious or genetic memory of once having lived in a perfect world, perhaps the garden of Eden, and that’s we’re all trying to get back to. He began to lose me there. “It was free love and all the bananas you could eat,” He said, then elbowed me and added, “but I don’t know what the ladies thought about it.”

I began taking my breaks up in his office. This was amazing to me that I could. He was the most senior designer on staff, one of the few remaining to have worked with the founder of the Disney company – the man who basically invented animated films and theme parks as we know them – yet John was basically ignored by the senior management he shared the floor with. So I’d sit there in the corner eating my bagel while he leaned over his computer working in Photoshop. Photoshop. I didn’t even know Photoshop then. It was new to him too, “You poke this button and all these little ants start marching around.” And, as he was working on designing the exterior paint scheme for the first Disney Cruise ship, “It’s all in there, the whole ship, but you can only see part of it at a time, you just keep sliding it back and fourth and it’s floating out there in space.” Some days I’d eat my bagel silently as he worked, never knowing I was there.
I asked him about Mary Blair, famous for her design of the Small World attraction. He recalled going to a CalArts fundraiser event and seeing her with a water glass full of vodka, and moments later, with an empty glass and her propped against a wall heading towards the floor.
I asked him about Salvador Dali, whom he worked with on an animated short (“Destino“) in the 40’s. They became good friends and John actually helped him with several paintings. (There’s even a play inspired by their friendship, “Lobster Alice.”) John told me they’d wanted to make a “fanana.” An idea they had for a sculpture of a fan that turned into a peeled banana through a combination of 2 rotating platforms and a pepper’s ghost effect. I’ve often thought I should build it.
Some new Disney attractions struck John differently – and literally. As the high-speed GM Test Track was about to open at EPCOT John had taken a test ride. I was shocked someone his age would go on a thrill ride like that, but I was still getting to know him. “How was it?”
In his slow gravely voice, “After I got off, I told them they should put warning signs on that!…”
“Well I’m sure they are.”
“…Warning signs that say ‘Men wearing boxer shorts shouldn’t ride.’ They take you over these different surfaces, and this one was so bumpy, and those seats are so hard, my testicles were going WHAM WHAM WHAM!” Slapping his hand on the table to demonstrate.
Maybe the pain kept balls on his mind because some time after that he showed me designs for these huge fiberglass characters being sculpted for the new All Star Resorts. A 40′ tall dalmatian from 101 Dalmatians was to be placed sitting on the ground. John insisted the dog be perched on a cushion as he explained “some kid is going to get a couple balls or balloons up under there like testicles and take a picture.”

He did also teach me ways to use color i would have never considered – and I considered myself a good colorist. He explained how when the colonial styled building that houses the epic “American Adventure” show at EPCOT kept growing in height to accommodate the ever growing theater behind it, he had to “keep your eyes on the ground” so you didn’t notice how huge the building was. His solution, using the fact that the eye is drawn to the point of highest contrast, was to use four different whites, each slightly more gray with each higher level, keeping the most brilliant white as the trim on the ground level. Looking at the building you’d never notice the white on the tower isn’t the same as the columns on the bottom.


There were other tricks too. If you think the facade for Disneyland’s Small World is all white, look close next time you’re there and you’ll see the sides of the shapes are painted light blue on the underside and light pink on the top – this warms and cools the reflected light bouncing off those shapes giving a subtle “life” to the facade a truly white facade would lack.
When I was born John was already 66. I can’t imagine being 65 and thinking there’s people not yet born that I’m going to be working with. The worst part of getting laid off from Imagineering was knowing he’d be gone before I’d ever get hired back. And sure enough a few years later, he died. But by chance I happened to stop at an estate sale in my neighborhood only to find it was John’s house. Almost everything was gone as it was late in the day but I did get a terrific 70’s colored metal artist’s cabinet from his studio for $40 that i still use. I also grabbed a roll of architectural drawings laying nearby and paid $10 – when i got home an unrolled it among other drawings was a nearly finished sketch for one of his Mickey portraits.
A few years before, when a friend decided to leave the Disney company she went to John to tell him the news, and expected him to be upset with her decision. Instead, “he took a deep breath and slowly wiped his hands down his face and said, ‘Do you know all the things I wanted to do?’ After elaborating and listing all the things not accomplished, he told her to go go go and not regret it.
There was definitely the sense that he’d stayed with the company (65 years!) out of respect to Walt and his vision – and, i think, also, to the guests that had come to expect quality from the Disney name.
And I think about all the Disney geeks and fanboys that make it their life goal to work for Imagineering – like I had – and here you had the most legendary of all Imagineers wishing he could’ve pursued his own ideas the whole time. Lesson learned. Point Taken. Etc. Etc.

Random Landscape Illustration Inspiration
February 6th, 2010
Look At This Fancy Trash
February 5th, 2010
Fake Louis Vuitton trash. Seen. Googled. And purchased.













