Here’s a three-part micro-documentary by Vice about Northern Colombians and their unique relationship with donkeys. Audio is SO NOT WORK SAFE.

And, yes, the kid above is taking about what you think he is.

I know Vice magazine gets a lot of crap, maybe deserved, but I think they do a great job addressing real things real people deal with that are either too sexy, or not sexy enough, for mainstream media. Now Vice has an online TV channel, webchannel, whatever, called VBS.TV and I watch it almost every day during lunch. Their series on heavy metal in Baghdad is probably the most accurate representation of what life is now like in Iraq, which is to say I almost crapped myself just watching it. There’s way more, so I’ll post my favorites here over the next weeks.

Unrelated: I’m eating Parrano cheese, it’s between Gouda and parmesan, and having a glass of Coppola’s Rosso Shiraz, which may or may not be a good pairing, but I don’t know any better.

I found these affixed to the wall over the sinks on a recent trip to the park. In small print at the bottom it reads “Hand washing tips provided by Brawny.” But these aren’t “tips” at all, they’re instructions on how to wash your hands, which, if you’re old enough to read, you’d already know. I didn’t use a stall to see if Charmin offered tips on how to wipe.

I bought it at prisonart.org where it was described at “Hand crafted Folsom prison cell made with popsicle sticks, craft sticks, felt, glue, etc. and with tools like tweezers, toe nail clippers, and razor blades.” SOLD! It was $46 with shipping, and signed on the back by George Bubier (currently serving at Folsom) as “Made by a Lifer 12/26/06.”

The version pictured on the site had a sliding cell door that could open, I liked that detail, I planned to leave the door open. But my version is sealed, which makes it way creepier (suggesting a new pessimism by the prisoner? He is serving life.). I expected something cute to put on my desk but immediately realized I don’t want to stare at prison walls (real or miniature) all day. And then I wondered if it wasn’t the artist’s way of sharing his sentence with others, “They can stare at the same cramped space I have to.” Or maybe having people like me pay to have a recreation of his space makes living in the original a little less undesirable. Or maybe it’s simply the only thing he could think to make. I’ll see how it goes. Someone may be receiving this as a gift very soon. I’d rather stare at those rainbow roses.

UPDATE: It’s been over a week and I’ve gotten used to it. I guess it stays.

Here’s video from a Hamas Television program where a blatant Mickey Mouse knock-off, Farfur, rallies Muslim children against America and Israel. Is no one at Hamas TV seeing the hypocrisy of using an American cultural icon to teach children to hate the country that created it?

It’s the same hill that burned a month ago, this time it’s the eastern side. Maybe by the end of summer the middle part with the Hollywood sign will go too. No smoke here in Burbank – but sucks to be in Glendale. Local humidity 7%.

The Fight Club author just started touring to promote his new novel, Rant, but he’s also promoting books he didn’t write–like, mine. In San Francisco earlier this week, he described Obscene Interiors as, “the funniest, dirtiest, book I have seen in years,” then gave out coppies durring the Q&A. (He’s also giving away Monica Drake’s debut novel, Clown Girl, which I haven’t yet read.) I never thought my book was that dirty, I mean, it’s not like I wrote about guys getting their intestines sucked out through their anus while masturbating in a hot tub.

Join me Monday, May 9th at Vroman’s Bookstore, 695 E. Colorado Blvd. Pasadena CA 91101 for his only planned LA appearance. There’s bonus prizes if you come wearing a a wedding dress (males and females), it’s related to the novel somehow. His other book tour dates are here.

See me at Slideshow, a monthly production with performers telling their stories, both fiction and non-, with slides, of course.

I’ll be telling a disturbing tale from my teen years in Fargo, featuring sex, theft, voyeurism, and moonlit gardening.

Pay $10 at the door but make a reservation to guarantee a seat – Call: (323) 692-3086.

Show is Sat May 19 at 8pm. The Fake Gallery is at 4319 Melrose in LA, 90029, near Vermont by Scoops and the Faultline, but we’ll have the free beer and wine.

I saw this today at Blackman Cruz, a favorite haunt here in LA. It’s a 1930’s dental model priced (and sold) at $2400. Although the dentist displaying it perhaps named it “Grinnin’ Jim” or an equally innocuous title, I imagine it still terrified depression-era children into never eating sweets, or sleeping, again.

Previously: Bones, Skulls, and Skeletons