I’ll be reading selections from my teenage journal about what I wanted to be when I grew up, and how to be gay. Get tickets now, Mortified always sells out.”Mortified” is a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, lyrics, home movies, and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers.

WHEN: Friday, June 27, and Saturday June 28, 2008 TIME: 8:00 PM VENUE: Make-Out Room  ADDRESS: 3225 22nd St, San Fran CA 94110 COST: $10 adv; $12 doorGet tickets onlineMore info: GetMortified.com

Join myself and others as we read our awful teenage journal entries to a crowd of strangers. I’ve done two different pieces before, (one is in the new book, Mortified: Love is a Battlefield). I have hundreds of pages of journal entries to choose from and this show will have new stuff - on the evils of drugs and drinking, and the art world about going to a new school and how to be gay.  Get tickets early, Mortified sells out fast.

WHEN: Wednesday, May 14, 2008
TIME: 8:00 PM
VENUE: King King
ADDRESS: 6555 Hollywood Blvd., 90028
COST: $10 adv; $15 door

TICKETS:
By Web: GetMortified.com By Phone: 877-238-5596

For some reason when I agreed to let Dave publish my old journal entries in his new Mortified book I didn’t accept that people would read the book. People I know. People I work with. People who will be surprised I wrote about them. And people upset that I didn’t write about them.

Oh well, too late now. At least my friend GJ’s piece is raunchier. (I never describe a partner’s ass as “an inverted heart that my dick will make into a spade.”)

If you want to see me recite my section live, I’ll be doing it at the Doomed Valentines Mortified show in LA next month, Feb 14, 8 PM. Get tickets here, it always sells out.  

This Sunday, celebrate my birthday in sasquatch style at the Bigfoot Lodge starting at 8 p.m..
Join the gang anytime after 8, I’ll be there ’till at least midnight - It’s all very casual - come introduce yourself!
Try the famous flaming “Toasted Marshmallow” - it’s a bonfire, dessert, and drink all in one!
The lodge doesn’t have food, but I’ll make sure we have some lovely nibbles. Hope to see you!

The Bigfoot Lodge a block east of the 5 (the Glendale side), on south side of Los Feliz Blvd.

If you insist on gift giving and need ideas, here’s my Amazon wish list.
But really, your crooked, inebriated smile is all I need for a good birthday.

The Fight Club author just started touring to promote his new novel, Rant, but he’s also promoting books he didn’t write–like, mine. In San Francisco earlier this week, he described Obscene Interiors as, “the funniest, dirtiest, book I have seen in years,” then gave out coppies durring the Q&A. (He’s also giving away Monica Drake’s debut novel, Clown Girl, which I haven’t yet read.) I never thought my book was that dirty, I mean, it’s not like I wrote about guys getting their intestines sucked out through their anus while masturbating in a hot tub.

Join me Monday, May 9th at Vroman’s Bookstore, 695 E. Colorado Blvd. Pasadena CA 91101 for his only planned LA appearance. There’s bonus prizes if you come wearing a a wedding dress (males and females), it’s related to the novel somehow. His other book tour dates are here.

See me at Slideshow, a monthly production with performers telling their stories, both fiction and non-, with slides, of course.

I’ll be telling a disturbing tale from my teen years in Fargo, featuring sex, theft, voyeurism, and moonlit gardening.

Pay $10 at the door but make a reservation to guarantee a seat - Call: (323) 692-3086.

Show is Sat May 19 at 8pm. The Fake Gallery is at 4319 Melrose in LA, 90029, near Vermont by Scoops and the Faultline, but we’ll have the free beer and wine.