Somehow I’m plugged in to the bear circuit cuz I see now this only launched a few hours ago – and of course the first person i’m connected to is someone I know. bearchatroulette.com

Staged last month in Amsterdam by De Nederlandse Opera. I mean really – could this action-figure execution be more genius?

Brought 2 my attn via http://barihunks.blogspot.com

Fake Louis Vuitton trash. Seen. Googled. And purchased.

Very “this is the piece that’ll get me into art school.” Drag queens standing on a black shard. Sharks (a metaphor?). And a primitive Basquiat-inspired demon figure. Shit like this plays well in a crowded BFA portfolio review meeting – “This one’s got the passion, he just needs to focus.” – but after you’re accepted you don’t know what to do with it, and lord knows your parents don’t want it, so you stick it on your wall in a desperate attempt to deny it’s true fate: the thrift store. And it’s there a couple kids will find it and have a great “omg look at this” moment, maybe snap a pic on their cell phone, and then go to lunch without buying it.

Art like this is only acceptable to display if your mother painted it, and that’s what you see when you look at it. Because the rest of us see the most boring and overused image ever. Flowers in an old-world windowsill. And it’s horribly composed and poorly rendered (as this scene so frequently is). But again, if mom painted it it’s great and warm and u can keep it.

I bought this exact same print on a family trip to Laguna Beach when i was 15 or so. I didn’t care about the joke: “Sitting duck” har har. I just liked the chill nature of the duck. I needed any image supporting relaxation to be on my walls at that time.

I really try to be supportive of people being creative. But sometimes it’s really REALLY hard. I mean you have no idea how badly i want to put quotation marks around “creative” here.

Blurry squiggle flowers in a penis vase is a new way to combine two common subjects and secure a purchase from a gay buyer.

Great example of the piece that didn’t get you into art school.  You hang it on your wall in a sour grapes victory. Who needs art school anyway. Theory just turns you gay. I like colors. Immago paint my walls yellow.

20 years later you think about the suckers still paying off their CalArts loans while they work at a brand licensing firm and insisting finding ways to put Dora the Explorer on a toothbrush is “still being creative you know.” You might be working as a bar back and considering charging guys to watch you jack off online but u know that’s still better than Sallie Mae having a $50,000 grip on your ass into middle age. OMG this has nothing to do with what i’m supposed to be talking about. What’s happened to me. I’ve become an LA Weekly film critic.

I was planning on much more being completed by now but had to pause the sex club effort to do a mega job for a mega company (which I’ll be back on from mid Jan – mid May) and then was asked to design an opera (opens Jan 23 in Long Beach) – which I’m completely absorbed in right now. But in between the two i designed the club’s condom and lube packets.

The condoms aren’t in yet because they must go through FDA approval (yes even if only the packaging changed). In designing them i looked at automotive product packaging and the masculine simplicity of generic IKEA-like labeling. Once inside the club i try to avoid text as much as possible and switch to using icons instead – like a big drip shape to indicate “lube,” because reading is is a forced mental process but image recognition is part of our animal nature – and when you’re in a sex club u r definitely getting in touch with your primal state.

The auto-body shop inspired entry is almost done. It still needs the new light fixtures and a few other elements. I wanted to beat it up and distress it but i can’t bring myself to do it yet. Maybe by may it will have happened naturally.

O and this is why i’m not blogging much – BECAUSE I’M DESIGNING 3 JOBS. Sex club, opera, and this other big secret gig. And while doing all that i’m trying to get Obscene Interiors II to happen, launch a zine, plan another major gallery event/show/party for late summer/fall, and find a publisher for another book project. My bathroom hasn’t been cleaned in months and i’ve discovered Fabreze works when you don’t have time to do the laundry.

I’m also looking for graphic designers (especially with dimensional and/or way-finding understanding), set designers,  3-d modelers/CAD/sketch up, and a lighting designer. And when i say graphic designer I don’t mean someone who laid out their church picnic brochure. I mean a designer with FLAIR and DRAMA who also understands it’s a sin to stretch a font in Photoshop.

Ok so that’s the deal. I’ll continue to post when i can find the energy to stare at my computer for yet ANOTHER hour. But as long as no other dream jobs land on me i’ll be spending May-September 2010 creating my OWN awesomeness for your viewing pleasure. Omg i’m so exhausted most days i just want to cry.

Kent Anderson Butler’s “Chic” spotted today at Carl Berg Projects at the Pacific Design Center.

Finally a editorial showing what you’ll look like in the morning in various underwear. There was more wood but you’ll have to find the mag yourself.

I’ve been seeing these around LA – PSAs from the Ad Council that must be the work of second year advertising students as this campaign appears based in ZERO audience research. Let’s break it down:

- my first read was “FAME,” not “FAKE.”

- the first statement is a request to “Take steroids.”

- but apparently you aren’t a “fake” until after you’re caught – hungh? what?- the whole point of using steroids is to make obvious gains in speed, size, and strength- outside of competitive sports (the ad is co-sponsored by the US Olympics committee) and Hollywood movie stars, no one really hides the fact they’re using them – they want the results to be seen.(And are there really that many Olympic athletes shopping at the Americana in Glendale where I saw this ad? No.)

- Did the creative team really think getting labeled a “fake”  is the biggest deterrent to using steroids? Hello. Have you seen that copper-orange goo bodybuilders openly slather themselves with before a competition? They aren’t hiding that they didn’t get that hue by putting in hours in the sun, nor do they care that you know they used steroids.

- There’s no distinction between illegal use and prescribed.

- I think going to jail would be a bigger deterrent to illegal use and stating so would clarify that the ad is addressing illegal use specifically.

- “DontBeAnAsterisk.com” – nice try but i don’t equate doing steroids with being an ass – having one, yes. And if they were trying to reference possible unwanted side effects with the asterisk graphics, well, they didn’t do anything with that idea.

- Steroids? This is the problem that warrants an ad campaign? There’s like a million other behaviors that are far more problematic and widespread – like incorrect use of apostrophes. Are there really more people “being fake” by going to the gym, eating right, and doing steroids, than the gazillions of people who are sedentary blobs taxing every aspect of healthcare (and my elbow room on a recent flight – ahem!)?

I highly recommend seeing “Bigger, Stronger, Faster,” this terrific documentary, mostly about steroid use and America’s contradictions with winning and cheating – and someone recently put it all on youtube. Do check it out before it’s gone.

Asians don’t handle alcohol well.

Evil witch holds hero prince hostage is the fairytale image, but gay revenge fantasy is what I read.

Maleficent was the ugly thin gay kid in school who now finds his fierceness (power) in dressing in outrageous, yet well designed outfits, while wearing excessive makeup and accessories to distract from his not-hot features (check out the shnozz and chin). In other words, feeling he possesses no celebrated masculine power traits he opts to gain attention by going full tranny – which of course just gets him/her labeled an even bigger freak who’s now not just ignored but shunned. (Remember the entire Sleeping Beauty debacle happens because Maleficent wasn’t invited to a baby shower.)

The tall skinny gay kid/Maleficent hates the prince because he’s the hot jock kid with rich parents who never had to work a day in his life and will get a sweet job from family connections by doing nothing. IT’S SO UNFAIR!  He lives in a bubble having no idea how the rest suffer. To make it worse, the tranny Maleficent also sorta wants to have sex with the prince but hates that she wants to – aghh, internal conflict, what to do? Tie him up – but not do anything to him! This way he’s forced to aknowledge you for once in you life and at least make eye contact, forcing him to see everything isn’t going as well for you because people like him disregard people like you.

Maleficent knows its a temporary victory and she will lose and he will win – like always. But before it’s over he’ll face the full force of her don’t-u-ignore-me bitch rage (when she becomes the dragon – FULL DRAMA QUEEN MODE!) After which, he will hopefully, she wishes, live the rest of his happily-ever-after days implanted with a tiny shrapnel of fear knowing there are people out there like Maleficent, who were not born pretty, rich, and connected, and they’ve got his number should he ever cross them again.

Blank black corridors get tiresome, so liven up your sex club’s walls with super-graphic super-graphics. Here I’ve chosen a nice bj image to set the mood. To add texture I’ve designed a subtle background diamond-plating inspired pattern using the logo of the club.

Paint the wall black – a flat finish is nice and velvety but a bitch to keep clean. I’ve chosen a Dunn Edwards interior black in eggshell finish – a nice amount of gloss. (Don’t get high gloss or u won’t be able to draw on it with chalk in a later step.)

Draw a grid on the wall in pencil based on the repeat size of your pattern. 18″ in this case.

Cut an 18″ square of Gatorboard, then Spray 77 a 1/4″ piece of foam to the board, overlay your logo (remember to reverse it), then cut it out of the foam. Using the grid on the wall, start stamping. It’s ok if some drip or don’t fully stamp – it’s a sex club, things should get a little messy. I’ve chosen DE6356 “Sheet Metal” although the lighter gray, DE6348 “Draw Your Sword,” seems more appropriate given the venue.

Now, in Photoshop make a scaled 18″ grid over your artwork, then divide each of those squares in half and print it out. This is our guide as we draw the line work on the wall in chalk. It’s easy because you’ve already drawn a grid on the wall for the pattern, now divide those squares again. It helps if you number the squares along the side so u don’t get confused as you begin drawing on the wall.

Time to run a paint test. Because i want the blue linework to fluoresce under UV light I’ll be painting it with Wildfire brand blue UV reactive paint. I find it’s best to paint a flat white undercoat, then the UV paint on top. UV paint is very transparent so it will take a couple coats. Because i want this to really pop, i’ve mixed 7 parts UV blue to 1 part UV white.

Now wipe off all remaining chalk marks with a damp rag, and light with UV fixtures. To avoid blasting the hall with UV light (which would cause anyone wearing a white shirt to light up the whole area when they walked by) I’m not using blacklight flourescent tubes, instead, 6 mini-UV-LED-spotlights and 3 blue UV mini-spots from MiniSpotlight.com. Now you’ve got a hot sexy wall that looks great under under bright lights for a photo or porno shoot (and promotes your venue by stamping your club name all over the image!), as well as regular, dark, club cruising conditions.